Felix's Story Beginnings

[Felix]

Yeah... well you see I tend to start a lot of stories... way more than I should, and I only get one or two chapters into them and I drop them. I thought I would post some of them here, just to keep track of them, and maybe I'll be inspired to work on them by some of you guys' comments ^^; If I get a lot further on any of them, I'll make a thread for that story, but I wanted to have a place to keep my snippets and beginnings and stuff.

Here we go, the first one is called "The Final One".




You will die. You are dead.

Bloodshot eyes turned in their sockets to betray dilated pupils. Nostrils flared under the boy’s heavy breathing. Fresh tears mingled with his sweat and dripped from his face A whimper crawled up his dry throat and escaped through his cracked lips. He shuddered. He was half-slumped against a tree, the wind whistling around him and through the branches above. It tore at his clothes and whipped his shaggy hair against his cheeks. He wiped snot and saliva from his face with the back of a trembling hand. His knees buckled and he collapsed.

Dead, dead. You will die. You are dead, you are dead, you are dead.

The boy released a hoarse scream, trying to blot out his thoughts. “Shuttup!â€

[Felix]

Here's the second one. It's called "Through the Window".




Ch 1

It was a young morning. A sharp current of early air swept in from the east and tap-danced on the tall thin branches at the peak of the huge poplar that slept faithfully outside Samuel’s window. The old glass window was propped open slightly, and a handful of the cold wind wormed its way under the crack and bit at Samuel’s face and chest. He shivered and sent his hand on a quest to find the nearest blanket. It returned with nothing to show for its efforts, so Samuel rolled over to the other side of his bed.

Except there was no bed left to roll on. Samuel yelped, taking an imaginary tumble over a cliff in his half-sleeping dream world. He hit the floor with a thump and tousled with the pile of sheets that attacked him a split second later. He emerged victorious.

At twelve, Samuel was still pretty small for his age. He had short blonde hair that seemed to never be content just to lie flat on his head. It insisted instead on always sticking up in odd and uneven spikes. His eyes were wide and blue and innocent and seemed to display his emotions like a billboard.

“Sammy? Is that you? Are you okay?â€

[Esoteric]

Beginnings are always the easiest. But in spite of that, I thinks yours are very well done. Both read fluidly, and in fact, I was almost tempted to think they were part of the same story.

[Photosoph]

Yes: beginnings, when you have all the ideas and excitement fresh in your head... before time, or anything else dulls it all down. ^^"

These are really good. The first one, while it definitely had a darker tone/feel, was very well done. I loved the line:
[quote] “No.â€

[Felix]

To Esoteric: Hmm... maybe they are! You just never know.... Samuel could be the boy from the first one.. reborn in his new life o.o Hehehe, I don't think about things that deeply.
Thanks though!

To Sophie: Wow, thanks! ^_^ I appreciate your feedback. Yeah, I don't know what's up with that formatting thing... it's not supposed to be like that... oh well!
Again, thanks! Since you liked them, I think I'll definitely try to get some more written on them both ^^; I'll keep you updated it I do!

[Photosoph]

That's cool! And thanks: I'd love to be kept up to date. ^_^ If you write more, I'd definitely love to read it.
All the best, Felix! \(^_^)

[Aileen Kailum]

Wow. Both of those openings were nice. I second what Photosoph said about that line in the first beginning.

[Felix]

Thanks very much!! ^_^