i have no idea what to call it

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i have no idea what to call it

Postby Althaia » Sat Oct 07, 2006 7:31 pm

okay listen i need some help name this poem its annoying i have been wracking my brain for it but cannot find maybe some of our more talented creative people can help me out this a poem/song/story thing:

as i lie asleep i dream
i dream of a man and
a monster one in the
same they are one
they come towards me
trying to frighten me but
i am not frighten
i have a light
a light they don't
i have the light of.....
my holy father
my God he protects me
keeps me safe from the man
then as i wake i see the light
shining over me
i realize the dream
was not a dream
but my life
continuelesly the man tries
to keep me from God
but in vain he tries
for God is the one
the onewho protects me
the one who protects all
from the spirit who tries
to turn us to sinful deeds

tell me what you think note:i am very attached to thisso yeah please don't kill it :shake: constructive criticism is apperciated :dance: :dance: :dance: dancing bannas!
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[color=cyan]† [size=84]smile Jesus loves you[/SIZE][/color]

procastinators unite.......................tommorrow

[color=palegreen]So in times when all your hope is gone
And you go through life afraid
In your heart there lies a hopeful song
That is there to guide the way
And all the hurt and all the pain
You soon will learn was not in vain
For all your prayers, they will be heard
They'll come to pass through faith [/color]

[color=palegreen]~When you Believe from Prince of Egypt


[/color]
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Postby Shia Kyosuka » Mon Oct 09, 2006 9:12 am

Hm. It's pretty good.

I just have a few problems with the format... >_>

and there's a few typos. But yeah looking past those, it's pretty good. :)
had enough.
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Postby Althaia » Mon Oct 09, 2006 9:20 am

thank you ^_^ you have an idea what to call it i would really apperciate it
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
[color=cyan]† [size=84]smile Jesus loves you[/SIZE][/color]

procastinators unite.......................tommorrow

[color=palegreen]So in times when all your hope is gone
And you go through life afraid
In your heart there lies a hopeful song
That is there to guide the way
And all the hurt and all the pain
You soon will learn was not in vain
For all your prayers, they will be heard
They'll come to pass through faith [/color]

[color=palegreen]~When you Believe from Prince of Egypt


[/color]
User avatar
Althaia
 
Posts: 229
Joined: Sat Oct 15, 2005 12:00 pm
Location: is trying to calm herself

Postby Anna Mae » Mon Oct 09, 2006 12:39 pm

That is a sweet poem. Several possibilities come to mind for titles:
Dreams
Awaken
Assurance
Refuge

One useful tool you can always use when having trouble with a title is the thesaurus.
[SIZE="4"][color="DarkSlateBlue"]God has called me to mission work in Paraguay and Brazil. I may return to CAA someday. God bless all of you![/color][/SIZE]

[i]Two vast and trunk-less legs of stone stand in the desert. Near them, on the sand, half sunk, a shattered visage lies. Round the decay of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare the lone and level sands stretch far away. On the pedestal these words are inscribed:

“My name is Ozymandias, king of kings:
look on my works, ye mighty, and despair!â€
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Postby Althaia » Mon Oct 09, 2006 6:00 pm

YEY the great anna mae has posted i love your stuff its amazing
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
[color=cyan]† [size=84]smile Jesus loves you[/SIZE][/color]

procastinators unite.......................tommorrow

[color=palegreen]So in times when all your hope is gone
And you go through life afraid
In your heart there lies a hopeful song
That is there to guide the way
And all the hurt and all the pain
You soon will learn was not in vain
For all your prayers, they will be heard
They'll come to pass through faith [/color]

[color=palegreen]~When you Believe from Prince of Egypt


[/color]
User avatar
Althaia
 
Posts: 229
Joined: Sat Oct 15, 2005 12:00 pm
Location: is trying to calm herself


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