Corrupted wish game

[bobmonkeys]

Granted, you're a masochist so it feels better to be hurt.

I wish the next poster turned into a spoon.

[anlptgtsg]

Granted I am now born with a silver spoon.
I wish the next poster will turn into a plate.

[bobmonkeys]

Granted, but I eat all your food so you go hungry.

I wish the next poster would declare their love for me.

[TheMewster]

Granted, but she is a minor so that looks really awkward. 0_o

I wish I could eat all the fpod I wanted without getting fat.

[SincerelyAnomymous]

Granted, you can eat all of the fpods you want and never get fat.

I wish for someone to reply to this wish.

[Broly Ultimatrix]

Granted but the reply has nothing to do with Pi

I wish for the ungrantable wish.

[Kaligraphic]

Granted, you have the ungrantable wish. It won't be granted, but you have the wish.

I wish that the Tarrasque would stay dead.

[Zeldafan2]

Granted. But your wish is confused, because I don't know what that is.

I wish that words could be seperated.

[anlptgtsg]

Granted. A word could be separated but no one would bother.
I wish summer would end.

[Broly Ultimatrix]

granted... Que Zombie Apocalyps

I wish for more smarticles

[bobmonkeys]

Granted, but smarticles attract dumbicles. Since it takes twice as many dumbicles to balance out the smarticles, we now need to talk slowly and use smaller words to communicate with you. D i d Y o u G e t T h a t ?

I wish for more manga.

[eightluvver888]

Granted, but quality has dropped by about 194%, and you don't want to read them any more.

I wish for a mechanical pencil that never got lost.

[Broly Ultimatrix]

Granted and it haunts you all through the day and in your dreams and no matter what you do to it even throwing it into a volcano its waiting for you in your pocket the next morning.

I wish traveling through time didnt require me to jump off a building.

[bobmonkeys]

Granted, instead it requires that you stand under a falling grand piano instead.

I wish I could hear the screams of the food I eat.

[AdriTan]

Granted, you become so guilty that you die of starvation!

I wish food didn't scream!

[bobmonkeys]

Granted, but it starts to beg instead.

I wish I could think of a more horrible way to torture my food before eating it. (evil)

[Broly Ultimatrix]

Granted but the human society arrests you under terms of insanity just like fluttershy in shed...

I wish traveling the interwebs didnt cause mental scars

[bobmonkeys]

I wish that lichkinghugger made a wish regarding chickens, jazz music, and Pinocchio.

[Broly Ultimatrix]

granted chicken run now features a puppet that is made into the steering wheel of flying jazz school for little chicks. its a hoot.

I wish the ratio of smartcles to dumbicles was 1:1.5

[anlptgtsg]

Granted but you are part of the bad group.
I wish to be uplifted in this moment.

[bobmonkeys]

Granted, you are suddenly picked up by a giant and set on a tall building and not let back down.

I wish for a world where people in third world countries understood the pain of people living in first world countries.

[Kaligraphic]

Granted, people all over understand the common pain of being stabbed by evil ghost monkeys with knives.

I wish that we could get rid of the ghost monkeys.

[bobmonkeys]

Granted, but we replace them with evil space penguins with harpoons.

I wish to go back in time and stop myself from posting this post.

[Broly Ultimatrix]

Granted but... *time way Shatters*... guess I didn’t have to corrupt that wish after all

I wish I could fix the fourth wall Bob broke

[bobmonkeys]

Granted, but the other three walls are now broken and all of existence is gone.

I wish I could lick people's memories.

[anlptgtsg]

Granted. This will be activated when you lick all the toes in the universe.
I wish I have a good voice.

[bobmonkeys]

Granted, but if you ever so much as open your mouth, you will die a horrible and painful death.

I wish dolphins and whales were actually fish, so they would stop confusing me.

[Broly Ultimatrix]

Granted but they are now mad at you for changing them from mammals and are secretly piloting there revenge

I wish for a good costume idea for this upcoming holloween.

[Ally-Ann]

Granted, but someone steals it. Ooh, too bad. :<

I wish for this killer cramp in my neck to go away.

[Raleford]

Granted, it will vanish in 2 weeks.

I wish I knew what to do next.