Fish, goldenspines, Jaden, and Nate's Bogus Journey

[Peanut]

What is this?
A while back, myself, FishandChips, goldenspines, and Jaden formed an RP group off of CAA. We recently began a new campaign using the system known as Microlite20 and, after the initial session, we decided to share it all with you. Thanks to the magic that is roll20 and Twitch.TV. This will make it possible for us to do this in real time every Sunday evening.

Who is involved?
Myself, FishandChips, Jingo Jaden, goldenspines and Nate.

Can I join?
No. Its not that we don’t like you and all. Its just we don’t want to add anyone to this RP at this time.

Then why should we watch it?
Because any RP where Jaden, Fish, Nate, and goldenspines are controlling characters in is guaranteed to be entertaining. Don’t believe me? Just look at these characters

The Characters

AGRIPPA-Jingo Jaden [Chaotic Neutral]
A warrior from the North, Agrippa lives for two things: Blood and tribute. More a force of nature than a man, he does as he wishes, and isn't afraid to get his hands dirty.


SAMARKAND-Fish and Chips [True Neutral]
The party face, bard, and diplomat. Shrewd and amicable, despite apperances, he is an invaluable asset whenever words are needed, but more of a liability when swords are drawn.


RALPH R. RALPH III-Goldenspines [Chaotic Good]
A gnome mage who forgoes conventional weaponry for a shovel. He is unnervingly cheery all of the time even when the situation he is in is dire.

DAVID HEAVENGUARD-Nate [Neutral Good]
A dwarven cleric from a long line of clerics. In his chest beats the heart of a warrior, but his hands have been tied by the duty of his lineage. Nevertheless, a compassionate man, if easily irritable.


Still haven't been sold on watching us yet? Here is a write up of our first session that is serving as a prequel to the rest of this campaign. Note that this did not include Nate or goldenspines who are sure to add to the insanity (or help manage it).

The Kobold King

The story starts with a Bard named Samarkand (Fish) and a Fighter named Agrippa (Jaden) heading on separate roads towards the town of Heisenberg. They both come across a caravan that has been attacked and talk to one of the survivors who is a merchant who transports goods. He says that his son has been carried off by monsters as well as most of his goods towards the south. Agrippa tries to convince him to pay them for their services and rolls terribly resulting in the man being very upset with him. Agrippa storms off after telling him to kill himself. Samarkand agrees to help him and the man mentions (loud enough for Agrippa to hear) that he’s heard rumors that these monsters have quite a bit of wealth stored up. Agrippa returns quickly and agrees to help out in the hopes of acquiring more wealth.
They approach a place with some bushes and, in one of them, they see some movement. Agrippa moves around some of the bushes and spots a Kobold patrolling. He decides to sneak up on it but fails miserably and falls on his face. The Kobold spots him, sounds the alarm and two other Kobolds appear. One of the Kobolds, goes up to and attacks Agrippa but is unable to get past his armor. Agrippa stands back up and then partially impales it with a longspear covered in oil, almost killing it and lodging it into its shoulder. Another Kobold moves up and tries to hit him with a sling but has less success then the Kobold with the spear. Samarkand then sneaks up and tries to stab the sling wielding Kobold but misses. He then tries to break a flask of acid over the kobold’s head but his weak wrists result only in giving the Kobold a big lump on his head. The third Kobold runs and gets away. Agrippa finishes off the Kobold he was fighting, impales it fully, and lights it on fire. Samarkand backs off and hides after the Sling wielding Kobold hit him with a spear. That Kobold tries to run but Samarkand plays a song that charms him and prevents him from escaping. They interrogate him and find out that the camp is further to the south. They also find out that depending on what is going on their their could be anywhere from 8-20 Kobolds in the area. Samarkand tries to get Agrippa to kill off the Kobold by dropping a notebook and signaling for Agrippa to take its head off. However, Agrippa is a bit to stupid to pick up on subtle hints like that and instead opts to plunge his sword into its tail and grab it by the throat. Agrippa then asks about the wealth that the Kobolds has before putting the Kobold’s eyes out and then ripping its head off.
When they approached the Kobold camp they saw the Kobold that ran away reporting to the Kobold King and 4 other Kobolds. Samarkand decided to dress in Agrippa’s clothing, cut his hair and try to reason with the Kobold King. He approached the Kobold King and began to tell the the truth about what Agrippa had just done and that he was coming here to do the same to the Kobold King and his followers. Samarkand then asked about the kid and agreed with the Kobold King to possibly trade info on Agrippa for the kid. The Kobold King signaled for him to come back with him into the cave where the child is stored but then turns on him and holds him at spearpoint for the information which Samarkand “gives.” The Kobold King sends 3 Kobolds away to take care of this. Samarkand mentions he has a partner, who is secretly Agrippa, and says he can hold him hostage to. He then gives a signal for Agrippa to come out and Agrippa decides to make quite the entrance.
Agrippa pours lantern oil onto his sword and shield and then proceeds to charge through the camp fire to light it on fire. This so shocks the Kobolds that Agrippa is able to kill the remaining two Kobolds leaving only the Kobold King left. Samarkand tried to intimidate the Kobold King and but failed miserably. The Kobold King, now no longer in a state of shock, called for his warriors, causing the 3 Kobolds to return with 2 others. Agrippa then moved, intimidated the Kobold King, and tried to grab him to take him hostage but was unable to grasp the small creature. However before he could make a move to escape, Samarkand swiftly grabbed him and shoved his dagger to his throat. At this point they ordered the Kobolds to back off and proceeded to take the kid, some of the riches the Kobold King had (there weren’t as many as they thought), as well as the Kobold King back with them to town. There Agrippa turned in the Kobold King to the authorities and Samarkand returned the kid to his father. Samarkand also brokered a deal with the father to store the stuff they brought back with them and do a favor for him down the line.

So there you have it. We will be starting this Sunday at 9pm EST over at my live stream. We hope to see you all there.

[ClaecElric4God]

What, no Peanut character? How disappointing.
That aside, I'm sold. This sounds like fun (though decidedly confusing)! Can't wait to see the insanity you guys conjure up.

[Peanut]

What, no Peanut character? How disappointing.

I'm playing God.

It will probably make more sense tomorrow when we actually play. It'll make perfect sense then (or should).

[Davidizer13]

What, no Peanut character? How disappointing.

He's the Game Master/Dungeon Master (GM/DM, depending on the system you're running). Everything that the computer does in a video game RPG, he's doing - he builds and describes the game's world to the players, tells them if their attacks/moves work or not, acts as the AI for the monsters, does all the dialogue for all the non-player characters, etc. Like Peanut said, it'll become clear when you watch it - pen-and-paper RPGs are definitely better experienced or seen in action than described.

Anyway, I'm excited to see how you master storytellers work together! I've been trying to build a Pathfinder campaign for a couple friends so I can see how the whole RPG thing works, building characters and story over time and all that. Good luck, y'all.

[Peanut]

A couple of the players aren't able to make it right now so we are going to be starting an hour late.

Edit: Going Live

[Peanut]

Vod of the first session. I will try and do a write up on the campaign sometime later this week.

[ClaecElric4God]

That was a blast. You guys are awesome. I want to quote all my favorite lines, but it would take too much space.
I'm cheering for Samarkand.

I tried to stay up and watch all night, but 1:00 A.M. was pushing it for someone who had to get up and work in the morning. That said, thanks for linking the vid. Er, the vod.

[Peanut]

I'm glad you enjoyed it. We had a lot of fun doing it this past week.

[Peanut]

Session 2: Of Hammers and Doors

A few days after their adventure, Samarkand and Agrippa are contacted by a mysterious individual who claims to have a job for them. They meet him and his companions, a dwarf named David Heavenguard (Nate) and a gnome named Ralph R Ralph III (goldenspines), at the local tavern. He introduces himself as Alistair and claims he is representing a wealthy client from the Kingdom of Headon. His client would like to hire them to brave a dungeon and retrieve a magical artifact for him. They agree to leave the next day after Samarkand and Agrippa take care of some business. Samarkand went with David to dig up some money he had buried a short ways outside of town while Agrippa went to give some jewelry to a shady dealer to see if he could hunt down the noble it belonged to (which goes nowhere just yet).
They eventually split up with Alistair who tells them to meet them in a nearby town. In the first room of the Dungeon, Agrippa tries to inspect the door but only recognizes it as a door. Samarkand tries his hand and sees that its locked. Before Samarkand can do anything else, Agrippa knocks the door down and activates an arrow trap which hits him in the leg. After this incident, the party proceeds cautious down the corridor and happens upon two Goblins and two Dire Rats. Agrippa ran in, surprising the foes, and struck at one of the Dire Rats twice and threw a net at it but missed each time. David a Goblin, and Samarkand proceeded to fail to hit their respective targets (Samarkand quite spectacularly). Another Goblin hit David with his morningstar causing him some damage. Then Ralph walked in the room, cast sleep, and knocked out 3 out of the 4 monsters in the room. After that the party cleaned up the rest of the monsters pretty easily but not before a dire rat bit Ralph.
After walking through and observing an empty room, the party came across a large indentation in one of the hallways. Figuring it was a trap, they took one of the Goblin corpses and threw it on it causing the floor in that indentation collapses. They then walked through another empty room, pausing to observe it. In the next room, they ran into 3 Goblins, a Hobgoblin and 2 Howling Goblins.
Ralph entered into the room and casted Sleep, knocking out two of the goblins and the Hobgoblin. Agrippa then placed a net on top of the Hobgoblin and then attacked the remaining awake Goblin, killing it instantly. Samarkand then played a song about goblin genocide to inspire courage among the group. The rest of the party proceeded to act out the words of Samarkand’s song on the remaining Goblins, leaving only the Hobgoblin alive. At the end of the battle, Agrippa and Samarkand tried to find out what was up with this dungeon from the Hobgoblin finding out that there was one more room and that the goblins had been living in the dungeon, removing any bodies they found. They took the Hobgoblin with them into the last room where they saw a hammer between two statues. However, the Hobgoblin was unable to see the hammer. So, the party guided him to where it was and, upon touching it, the Hobgoblin was vaporized by lightning. After exploring the room a bit more, they read a plaque that said only those who are pure of heart may hold this hammer. David Heavenguard decided to give it a shot, and pick up the hammer. As they went to leave, the two statues came to life and began to attack them.
The beginning of this fight went well as David Heavenguard crit one of the Warforged Guardians and Samarkand was able to finish it off. However, as Ralph went away from the fight to try and survive, he found that a Goblin Shaman, along with 2 howling Goblins and 2 Hobgoblins had just arrived. The Goblin Shaman put Ralph to sleep while the rest of the Goblins moved into attack. Agrippa decided to pick up Ralph and throw him out of the way, then threw some oil flasks on the floor and lit them on fire. Agrippa fought the Goblins in a bit of a bottleneck and did quite well. However, the last Warforged Guardian began to get the upper hand against David. So, Agrippa moved out to try his hand at killing it while David retreated to heal his wounds. This exposed his back to the Goblins and between them and the Warforged Guardian, Agrippa was knocked out cold. Samarkand sang a song that charmed two of the remaining three Goblins in an attempt to prevent the battle from getting much more out of hand. By this point, Ralph awoke and used Magic Missile to take out the Warforged Guardian. The charmed Goblins took out the last Goblin and were then finished off by Samarkand and David.
After the party patched itself up, they exited the dungeon and were confronted by Alistair, a band of warriors, a couple of mages, and a child. Alistair told the group to hand the hammer over to the child which they reluctantly did what he asked. They were then put to sleep by the mages and later woke up in a castle dungeon.

[Peanut]

Going live. Will be doing the Microlite campaign whenever Nate gets on.

[ClaecElric4God]

Defenestrate...I never thought I'd hear someone else use that word. Awesome.

[Peanut]

Relevant Fanart post.

[Jingo Jaden]

The barrel is secretly the final boss.

[Nate]

"I don't need to set an alarm, I'll remember!"

Stupid brain...

[Peanut]

Going Live once again.

[Peanut]

The vod from this session. I lost last week's so expect a write up for both last week and this week sometime this week

[Peanut]

Vod from today

[Peanut]

I recognize I've been a bit lazy getting write ups to you guys. So I figured I'd try a new way of doing recaps that is shorter and more...picturey. Hope you enjoy it.

[Ante Bellum]

Ralph is best party member.

[Peanut]

Session 4

[Nate]

Those are the best updates.

[Peanut]

Last week's session.

[Jingo Jaden]

John you forgot about intimidating at least one of the two shop clerks.

That was kind of funny.

[Peanut]

Your right, I did forget that. Oh well, I've left out plenty from the other two updates as well so I guess people will just need to watch the last session... *not a shameless plug to get more views on his stream*

[Peanut]

Going to go live soon with another week of barrels and laughter.

[Peanut]

Session 6

[Peanut]

Rp Time.

[Peanut]

Vod from today's sessions.

[Peanut]

Session 7

[Ante Bellum]

This is without a doubt the best session yet. It'll be hard to beat that ending, that's for sure.