"Silver Wings"

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Postby Photosoph » Sun May 22, 2005 3:22 pm

Actually, I may not be posting as often, but I am still posting; now, however, I'm just posting comments on the chapters that you write -in other words, I'm not posting random stuff. ^_^

This was another great chapter -it's interesting to find out more about the 'chosen one', though maybe you could change 'the chosen one' into a different title? It's not bad, it's just that changing it into something like 'The El-nathar' instead of 'the chosen one' could be a little more unique. *shrugs*
What do you think?

Ah, chaotic houses... our one is a pretty good example of a chaotic house too. ^_^ I'll be looking forward to more!

<Edit>By looking above at the 'CAA: Christian Anime Alliance>Anime&Entertainment>Writing>"Silver Wings"> I think we're still in the writing forum. But to stay here we need to not post random off-topic things. I think it's like that. Maybe go back and look at UC's post.
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[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD

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Postby LostChild » Sun May 22, 2005 4:29 pm

ya... i was thinking that "Chosen One" needs to be different, and i'm working on it. i'm totally open to suggestions for that one! ^_^ El-nathar so far, i like the sound of it.
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Postby Photosoph » Sun May 22, 2005 4:42 pm

I'm glad you like that. ^_^ Or you could go for something in a foreign language, for example: in French 'Chosen one' could be translated... "L'une choisi" (though I'm not totally sure of the grammar in that). :sweat: Or I wonder if there's somewhere on the internet where you could get 'Chosen One' translated into the Elven tongue.
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[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD

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Postby Warrior 4 Jesus » Sun May 22, 2005 6:44 pm

Sorry Lost, I've been away the last few days.



Chapter 6:

After several nights away from home, Kaylin had another dream vision.

Mariee was standing alone among a thin forest of trees. She was gazing off toward the horizon, yet it was not the setting sun and her beautiful golden face that held Mariee’s attention.

She appeared young, maybe just a little short of her Coming of Age. Never before had Kaylin seen this woman that filled her dreams, at such ease with the world. There was no pain, no hiding, and no running. She was happy.

As Mariee held her gaze on the thing in the distance, Kaylin saw her joy turn to sorrow, and then to fear. The western sky darkened and a figure became faintly visible by a subtle glow. It solemnly proceeded to Mariee, carrying a small scroll bound by a red ribbon. What was inside it, Kaylin dare not guess for fear of it opening a Pandora Box; leading to the ill omen of an apocalypse to destroy the world.

Panting, Kaylin woke to the dying embers of the campfire crackling sadly as if they too had witnessed her dream. Gillias slept peacefully not far away, curled up like a resting cat.

Someone was standing on the hilltop above their makeshift campsite, and Kaylin saw it was Limbar. The stars were untouched by the night mists that clung to the treetops and hillsides, and they shone brightly.

Hearing Kaylin stir, Limbar turned to her. “Sleep, Kaylin. We have another long ride ahead of us.â€
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Postby Warrior 4 Jesus » Sun May 22, 2005 6:51 pm

When Kaylin woke, she found Gillias had already started a fire, and Limbar making the morning meal. The air was filled with the delicious scent of seasoned meats, and steamed vegetables. Her red eyes flashed orange in the morning light.

“Well, would you look at that, Gillias,â€
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Postby Anna Mae » Sat May 28, 2005 5:55 pm

I like the way you slowly reveal more and more about Kaylin's past and the events surrounding her. Keep it up!
[SIZE="4"][color="DarkSlateBlue"]God has called me to mission work in Paraguay and Brazil. I may return to CAA someday. God bless all of you![/color][/SIZE]

[i]Two vast and trunk-less legs of stone stand in the desert. Near them, on the sand, half sunk, a shattered visage lies. Round the decay of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare the lone and level sands stretch far away. On the pedestal these words are inscribed:

“My name is Ozymandias, king of kings:
look on my works, ye mighty, and despair!â€
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Postby Warrior 4 Jesus » Sat May 28, 2005 6:12 pm

Please Lost we must have more story!
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Postby Photosoph » Sat May 28, 2005 8:49 pm

Another great editing job, W4J :thumb: . Yes, more story! *petitions Lost* But if you're too rushed and stressed, don't worry; though it would be cool to see some more.
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[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD

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Postby SorasOathkeeper » Sun May 29, 2005 4:00 pm

Ok, Whenever Lost comes on here her compy freezes so she sent me the rest of the chapter so i'll be posting it till she gets everything fixed and what not. She also told me to tell you that she might not be able to wright it for a while cause of finals and stuff.

“Often times they seem to have reached the limit of their abilities, and then even at the most unexpected of times, they turn around and complete a feat totally unexpected of them.â€
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Postby SorasOathkeeper » Thu Jun 02, 2005 12:58 pm

Wow...sorry Lost i think i killed your thread. ^_^;;; Any how, here's more...

After saddling and mounting their steeds, Limbar led Kaylin southwest in the direction of Crimbold Pass. They would not come to the place for many days yet to come.
Until the time came for them to seriously think of daring the frozen heights of the mountains, they would pass many towns and villages, plains, hills, rivers, and ravines. With each league left behind, Kaylin was that much closer to starting a new life with her dragon. Unconceivable dangers lay ahead for her, though these dangers would be unknown or even fathomed by Limbar, who was battling a raging torrent of thoughts and misleading feelings.
Exactly what it was she thought she must do, Limbar did not recognize it. Like an old memory stored in the depths of the mind stirred by one of the senses, she knew she had been commanded to complete a task she did not want to even think of. What was it?
Gillias shared this unpredictable ride of emotions, but knew not what it was Limbar was fighting. She sensed the good and evil deeds bestowed upon herself and her Elf, and had the will to prevail in whatever was right, even if it meant betraying those whom she had known all her life. She had the mind to protect those who she loved, trusted and adored.
Poor Kaylin: all alone in the dark world of her mind. No one to truly share her thoughts and feelings; at least not yet. All her hopes and dreams lay in the finding of a dragon she could call her own: a hatchling, nonetheless, with which she could train and one day explore the world with. That day was coming fast.
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Postby Photosoph » Thu Jun 02, 2005 2:48 pm

That's cool! Btw, I like your new av, Soras. Go the forgotten world of old floppy disks! \(^o^)
That's okay about the finals, I'm guessing most of us know what hectic times those can be. It's good to see and read more of the story, and interesting to find out more about the white-eyed dragons. I hope the probs with Lost's computer don't last. T_T
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[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD

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Postby LostChild » Thu Jun 02, 2005 6:29 pm

okay, i'm here, but maybe not for long. i'm thinking about starting another thread for this but in the goof off. hopefully then i'll be able to come in when ever i want! ^_^ thanx sora!
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Postby LostChild » Sat Jun 04, 2005 6:55 pm

soo... when ever ya'll want, its in da goof off. ^_^ peaches.
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Postby Anna Mae » Mon Jun 13, 2005 8:00 am

Thanks for posting more story! This section seems to have more of a recap feeling... very detached. I like that.
[SIZE="4"][color="DarkSlateBlue"]God has called me to mission work in Paraguay and Brazil. I may return to CAA someday. God bless all of you![/color][/SIZE]

[i]Two vast and trunk-less legs of stone stand in the desert. Near them, on the sand, half sunk, a shattered visage lies. Round the decay of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare the lone and level sands stretch far away. On the pedestal these words are inscribed:

“My name is Ozymandias, king of kings:
look on my works, ye mighty, and despair!â€
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Postby LostChild » Mon Jun 13, 2005 4:27 pm

i try. that's why i'll hopefully get the chance to sit down and revise again soon. ^_^ i'll be back later to post more after i'm done with everything.
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Postby SorasOathkeeper » Sat Jun 25, 2005 10:38 am

W00T! I got all cought up!^^ More More More! *whenever you get the time :D
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